Posts tagged foster mom
Adoption and Trauma

Many families I have worked with who have adopted have expressed feeling a need for more support. These families were not fully aware of the extent of their child’s trauma until after the adoption was finalized. These experiences are very real and can be extremely overwhelming. However, I always tell parents that the number one predictor for how their child is going to heal is the relationship they have with their child and the environment they have at home. Parents can’t control what has happened to their child or take away their child’s pain, but they can begin to take back control on how they connect with their child and the space they provide for them to heal.

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You are more than a foster kid. -From a former foster kid.

My name is Brittaney. I'm a midwest girl turned loyal New Englander. Former foster kiddo, current foster mama. I’m married to my sweet husband, Justin, and this coming November we will celebrate our 8th wedding anniversary. Over the last three years we have fostered three amazing kids and hope to adopt our son out of foster care late this summer. Foster care has always been apart of my story. I was adopted out of foster care when I was seven and was gifted this beautiful life that I am incredibly proud of. I have always wanted to gift that to someone else one day, which lead me to becoming a foster parent.

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I Get Too Attached

And the children who leave our home? They deal with the inevitable loss of losing family yet again. This whole thing is–at its core–broken. But, along with their loss, they carry with them the gift of attachment. They take with them the love we poured into them and the picture we’ve given them of what family is and can be. In our getting “too attached,” they get to learn what attachment is. 

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4 Things I've Learned As A Single Foster Mom

But now I’m a parent - to other people’s children.  I LOVE the parenting part; caring for these children is my greatest joy.  I’ve got a lot of experience with infants and kids and feel pretty comfortable there.  But foster care isn’t regular parenting.  It’s parenting on a roller coaster, with lots of other people involved.  I’m still processing all that I’ve learned over the last year, but here are a few of my takeaways 18 months into this gig…

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The Joys of Parenting Foster Youth

From the other room we heard our eldest son whisper, “I know this is scary. When I went to my first home I was scared too. But we are safe and we will feed you and we won’t hurt you at all. I’ll be your buddy.” For the next week, that little boy was never more than two feet away from our eldest son, he was his safe person through that difficult and confusing time. 

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Twins Fostering Together!

“I didn’t know twin sisters could foster together!” We hear this statement often as we tell our story and, honestly, when we began to pursue foster care, we didn’t know if we would be allowed to foster together, either!

I'm Kelli Hoeckner and my sister Kimmee and I are identical twin sisters and we’ve been fostering together for almost one year! Oh, and did I mention we're 25 years old?

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