Out of respect for the birth mother and her family, we are beginning her story as she found the adoptive parents for her child.
I grew up outside of Houston, and I’m a birth mom.
When I told my parents I was pregnant they were immediately unsupportive. After their reaction, being 19 years old, I knew this was not the healthiest, most prosperous life I could give my baby.
So I knew adoption was the best option.
It was a strange process with the couples I met with before finding the ones I chose to adopt my baby. But when I met C and S everything became clear and started making sense.
They were mutual friends of my cousins, and the timing of meeting them was unbelievable. They welcomed me into their lives and into a relationship like I had never experienced. They brought me into their circles of friends and introduced me to their families, they asked about me and heard my heart’s cry and nurtured it in the ways that I needed it most. They showed me what a relationship rooted in Christ looked like. They empathized with me and cried with me, confessing to me that their hearts hurt knowing that their most joyful day would be my most painful day. They cared for me by researching, finding, and paying for me to get counseling through the process. They found a counselor who was a birthmother herself. She prepared them that she would be seeking the best for me and not convincing me into adoption. They opened their home to me, and wanted me to see where my baby would be living and growing and experiencing life. They revealed so much of Jesus’ character that had always been so foreign to me.
I wanted more of Jesus because of them.
Their love changed my life, and I couldn’t be more grateful for that.
Even though I had so much peace about placing my baby girl, when I left the hospital alone, I was brokenhearted…Incomplete.
It felt like I had lost a piece of myself. Even with all the comfort and love her new parents extended to me, I was in a pain that is unlike anything else.
I had my sister, my Young Life leader from high school, and my cousin with me for support during the two days awaiting our Entrustment Ceremony. Without them, I would have been a complete mess.
I would love for the stigma of fear in adoption to go away. Adoption is generally seen as a beautiful situation for the child and the adoptive parents, but so often the birth families are a forgotten piece of the story, but man… my family’s story has added a whole new level of beauty to this adoption. My parents went from being angry with me, to tearfully asking me for forgiveness, commending me for my decision, and having framed pictures of my baby girl by their bedside tables. Their connection with her and love for her is such a testament to the redemptive power of Christ that I would have never been able to witness in such a way had I not gone through everything I did.
Placing your child for adoption is not easy, but it was my best for my girl.
I want to encourage adoptive families out there to be open to their children’s birth families. Don’t be afraid to share real and raw emotions together. Let your birth mom know that you care about her and how thankful you are for the opportunity to parent her child.
Being a birth parent is such a gift. My baby girl will be four years old come next March and I have been able to see her at least 3-4 times a year. The Lord went through leaps and bounds to make sure my girl was born and that she was put in the hands of who He intended her to be placed. It thrills me that I get the opportunity to witness his plans unfold for her life.
She is chosen. She is loved. She is fearfully and wonderfully made.