Adult Adoptee Asks Why

My name is Katelin, I live in Huntington Beach, and I was adopted at Birth. 

I always here negative stories about adoption and I want people to know that adoption is not always negative.

Adoption was always an open topic growing up. My parents never hid anything from us and always answered, or tried to answer, any question we had… So I have always known I was adopted.
When I was younger perhaps 5 and under, I thought adoption was normal and that everyone was adopted. My parents tell the story that we would be in the grocery store and I would ask people who/where their birth parents were :) 

As open as adoption was in my family I was always very curious about my birth family and where I came from.

As I got older questions and feelings began to arise that I couldn’t understand. I remember being a young teen and one of my friends asked me why my birth parents didn’t want me… That obviously upset me and I didn’t have an answer.

I wanted to know why. 

I feel that for anyone who is adopted, you want to know why you were given up. I didn’t understand how someone could do that to their child…I carried that with me for a long time. 

When I was 16 years old I told my mom and dad that I wanted to meet my birth mom. I had a closed adoption so my parents had to find her first and we weren’t sure how she was going to react to me wanting to meet. However, a couple of months later, I wrote her a letter, made a photo album and my parents sent it out. Within a month, she wrote back and sent photos! 

I was so happy. 

A few years later and after many letters and phone calls, I got to meet my birth mom. It was the most emotional day of my life. I cant even describe it. It was like a mom meeting her newborn baby for the first time. I was blown away at how much I was loved. Not just by her, but her new husband and her three children as well!  

My birth mom is now very involved in my life. Even though she lives in a different state she always makes an effort to come here for the big events in my life like when I graduated high school, college and when I got married. When I first meet her, I had a lot of questions. The main question was why… After 18 years I got my answer and am finally able to understand. 

My advice for people considering adoption: Go for it! Adoption is a beautiful thing and such a blessing. I cant wait to adopt children one day. Adoption is not selfish, it is a gift. My birth parents were not ready to be parents, they wanted more for me. My birth parents weren’t being selfish, they couldn’t give me the life that they wanted me to have.

I love being adopted! I have two families that love me, how much more blessed could I be! My favorite adoption quote is,  “Many hearts, one beat”.  My family has many hearts and they are all connected by my heart beat. 

~Katelin

Find Kaitline on Instagram at: @katerummel

(photos above by whitrunyon.com, not of Katelin's childhood)